i am a lazy, worthless beast.

For days, all I've wanted is a Saturday. Since that point on Sunday where I realized that a new work week was rising, all I've wanted was a Saturday to relax, catch up, clean up, work out, and do errands--typical Saturday things.

Well, it's finally Saturday. I woke this morning without a hangover, thanks to the fact that a single drink last night cost $9.25. So I only had three, one of which was bought for me. That made it easy to wake up when my phone rang at 9am (especially when I saw it was a call from California where it was only 6am).

I talked to Bobo for a bit. Then I called my mom. Then I talked to Joanie. Then I called my sister. Then I talked to Jen. All this without ever getting out of my bed. Next thing I know, it's noon, and I haven't done a damn thing except take advantage of my free nights and weekends, which I really should do anyway for $60 a month.

Driven by hunger and an unignorable need to brush my teeth, I got out of bed. As I was brushing, I decided I must change my bed sheets. So after brushing, I washed a big tupperware container, dried it, and filled it with honey nut cheerios. I added a sliced banana, some sugar, and some milk, dropped a spoon in it, and sat on the floor and ate. THEN I grabbed fresh sheets out of the bathroom for my bed.

Being slightly neurotic/meticulous about my bed making (serious issues about head- and feet-ends of blankets always being in the right place), I spread out my new sexy sateen sheets, put the pillow cases on, threw the comforter up, flipped it over to hide its need to be washed (yet maintained the proper head-foot balance), and when I was done, it looked so damn comfortable that I crawled up on top of it and took a nap.

A three hour nap.

Now it's 4:00. I missed my class at the gym. I haven't washed the pile of dishes in the sink. I haven't worked on my paper. I haven't even put on fresh deodorant. I did, however, just eat three pieces of cheese, which was also very high on my list of Important Things to Accomplish.

But I MUST get my ass in gear. Tonight I have a housewarming party to attend. I have four hours remaining to decide upon and purchase a gift (likely wine), wrap it (or stick a bow on it), come back home and shower (and shave everything that needs to be shaved), put on that much-needed deodorant, pick out clothes that say "I'm hot, but casual and spontaneous and fun" (but also show enough cleavage to get the aforementioned Sort Of Boyfriend back to my apartment after the party), get dressed in said clothes, then head towards the party WITH the gifts and my other alcoholic beverages which I hope the aforementioned Sort Of Boyfriend will help me carry. Really, when I look at it, I have a lot to do, and yet instead of DOING it, I'm sitting here writing about it. It's just one of those rainy Saturdays upon which I reaffirm that I am a lazy, worthless beast.

But at least I brushed my teeth.