I doubt this is enough to whet anyone's appetite but I still have to share it.
The other day I was walking up the street, on my way to the gym, and talking on my cell phone. In fact, specifically, I think I was leaving a voicemail for my sister when It Happened.
There was some noise over my head, but not enough to take my attention. Moments later, an objected landed with a loud, hollow thwump on the sidewalk about five feet in front of me. I took a step closer while looking up to see two seagulls fighting. (I hate them almost as much as pigeons, if not more, now.)
As I got closer to the Object, my brain scanned all known shapes and colors for a match. Best I came up with was "rotten cucumber." But my next step revealed a three-dimensional truth: a nasty, disgusting, smelly, rotten, hollowed-out fish head.
It was at this point, or near to it (my memory has blocked out the details) that I yelled into my sister's voicemail "A FUCKING FISH HEAD!" This decaying ocean sewage instantly became the most bizarre and disgusting thing I've seen fall from the new york sky yet.
I stepped squeamishly over and around the decapitated aquatic creature, and cursed angrily at the asshole seagulls overhead. For a moment, I questioned whether they got it from a garbage can or the nearby river, but then decided it didn't matter--it was still a nasty, rotting, disgusting, fish head that fell from the sky and almost hit me.
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3 comments:
sweeeeeet!
Fucken awesome! Totally Fooken Awesome! Once some kids threw a garbage cans worth of water from their roof on me...it was a hot summer night so it was cool.
YIKES! 'Nuff said.
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